Happy New Year/What’s In A Name
Here’s to 2010. Where the hell are my flying cars?!?!
Some stuff about band names . Bicker, threaten, enjoy!
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Mediocre bands with undeservedly awesome names—
Zodiac Mindwarp and the Love Reaction (greatest band name ever, band itself rightfully forgotten)
Superjoint Ritual (love everyone in the band, yet somehow the whole is lesser than the sum of its parts)
Social Distortion (I’ve warmed to their sound over the years . . . somewhat)
Agoraphobic Nosebleed
Agnostic Front (Yeah yeah, they invented New York Hardcore, blah blah blah, they’re mediocre.)
The Stone Roses
Black Rebel Motorcycle Club (really liked their first disc, the rest not so much).
Dirty Rotten Imbeciles
Pussy Galore
Revolting Cocks (I dig RevCo and I love pretty much all of Al Jourgensen’s projects, but nothing could live up to the awesomeness of this name)
And You’ll Know Us By the Trail of Dead (cumbersome, but a great name nonetheless)
Cycle Sluts from Hell
Crystal Method
Dirty Rotten Imbeciles
Awesome (or at last very good) bands with terrible names–
Beastie Boys
Bad Brains
Squirrel Nut Zippers
Snot (not an awesome band, perhaps, but WAY better than the name would suggest)
eyehategod
The Fugees (not helped a bit by adding Translator Crew)
Death Breath (see: Snot)
Pantera (Ah, the perils of naming your band when you’re really young.. See also: Beastie Boys)
Alice in Chains
Big Business
System of a Down (not so much terrible as it is needlessly perplexing)
Bands with terrible names who are so good they somehow improve the quality of the name itself:
The Beatles
Metallica
The Melvins
Anthrax
U2 (I actually don’t like U2 at all, but I recognize that they are the hugest band in the universe for a reason)
Portishead
Neurosis
Is this band name brilliant or awful? Both? I can’t decide–
Butthole Surfers
Dead Kennedys
Therapy?
Goatwhore
Godspeed You! Black Emperor
Smashing Pumpkins
Anal Cunt
Mr. Bungle
Cowboy Junkies
Buzzov*en
Sleepytime Gorilla Museum
Bands whose name does not really reflect their sound—
Death Angel
Spirit Caravan
Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
Soundgarden
Boredoms
Soulfly
Faith No More
Screaming Trees
Job For a Cowboy
Agents of Oblivion
Alice in Chains
Superjoint Ritual
Bands whose name perfectly captures their sound—
Motorhead
Morphine
Napalm Death
Stray Cats
Black Sabbath (Ozzy and Bill era only)
Mazzy Star
Credence Clearwater Revival
Band names destined to be mispronounced for all of eternity (non black metal edition)—
YOB
OM
SunnO)))
!!!
Samhain
Hed(pe) [when future music archivists uncover some dusty old hed(pe)compact discs, and no other material which makes even passing reference to them, what will they say? What will they say?]
Jesu
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More to come . . .
January 15th, 2010 at 3:10 pm
If Sade is still around, she’d work on the mispronounced list.
Do you think “Beatles” is a terrible name? To me, it’s like “The B-Sharps,” mildly amusing but not really terrible. I even like “Silver Beatles” (actually even more than “Beatles”).
January 15th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
Ah, Sade is a good one! We’re definitely gonna need a second set of lists.
I think if The Beatles weren’t THE BEATLES most people would say it was a stupid name. It really is nothing but a corny goof on an already established band’s name: The Crickets, just like Chubby Checker was to Fats Domino. It’s the music of the Beatles and their obviously legendary status that makes us automatically overlook the lameness of their name. Ditto Metallica. If they weren’t METALLICA, their name would make them sound like a clueless, cut-rate cover band. I read a post somewhere recently talking about Metallica’s name and it said something like, imagine a hip hop outfit who called themselves The Rappers.
January 20th, 2010 at 8:47 am
Eh, I wouldn’t say the Monkees is a terrible name (just not a good one) but I agree with you about Metallica.
I could have seen Metallica open (I think for Ozzie Osbourne) in 1986 but stood out in the parking lot with a bunch of other losers while they were on.
January 20th, 2010 at 9:01 am
What I meant about the Monkees was that I don’t think it was their music that was influencing me so much (but maybe).
February 24th, 2010 at 9:56 am
Have you heard of this guy: http://www.nku.edu/display_news.php?ID=3806
I’d be even more impressed if he was asked what made you get out of it, and he said, “Nothing.”